Notice, Surrender, Cherish

Intimacy is the beating heart of a rich life, and it’s there for anyone willing to dive deeply into its bliss. Intimacy is more than the intoxicating feeling of falling in love, it’s the result of a mindset willing to be aware, to surrender, and to cherish.

Intimacy is knowing your own baby’s cry in a crowded room of children.
It’s memorizing the rough spots on your lover’s hands.
It’s recognizing a scent as you walk through a store and turning to see if your dear one is there.
It’s reading a friend’s face without any spoken words.

I can’t explain how the pieces fell together to create the effect, but once (and only once) I entered my own kitchen, and it smelled exactly like my grandmother’s kitchen. It was a smell I hadn’t experienced since 1990. It brought me to my knees with happy tears. Love for her and from her raced through my veins. That’s the sort of intimacy that’s at the heart of a rich life.

Feel the feels.

Intimacy is found in slowing down, not speeding up. Pay attention to the little things. Tune into your senses. Be present in the moment and not wrapped up in the past or the future.

Take note of what you’re seeing, hearing, feeling, touching, and smelling. Feel all the feelings. Amplify those good feelings, so you imprint them on your nervous system.

Take care.

Take care with your actions. The bliss of intimacy also involves vulnerability, and we never want to cause harm.

Take care with your actions, so that the intimacy you’re creating leaves a smile in others. And if it leaves any pain, be sure it’s the pain of fondness, not the pain of hatred.

It hurt that day my kitchen smelled like my grandmother’s, but it was a good hurt. A hurt that flushed out memories of a remarkable woman and a rich life.

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